How to Approach A Super Hot Girl in 4 Steps

by The Asian Casanova on June 9, 2011

How to Approach A Super Hot Girl in 4 Steps

Tired of pathetically fantasizing about dating hot girls? You see that bombshell hottie sitting next to you in class, or reading a book near you in the bookstore. You can’t help but gawk helplessly at her and fantasize about all the things you *wished* you could do with her. Soon, she closes her book before flipping her magnificently angelic hair, leaves the aisle, and walks out of your life forever. This is the typical story for every guy. By virtue of reading and being a part of this website, you will not be that typical clueless guy. It’s now time to take action, to learn how to approach a super hot girl.Hopefully by now, you have adopted the correct mindset as illustrated in Overcoming Fear of Talking to Beautiful Women. Instead of engaging in unproductive self-talk such as, “She won’t want me, she won’t have the time, she looks busy,” you should be in  a more productive zone where you actually want to figure out what to do, “What should I say?” Now we’ve made a huge leap in progress. We’ve got a long way to go, so saddle up cowboy, we’re in for a ride.

What should I say?

I just mentioned another age old question that most guys wonder about, “What should I say?” If I could get a nickel for every time I’ve heard a guy say that when asking them to approach a hot girl, I’d be ridiculously rich. Guys are way too focused on what to say. They want a “line” to use that will make her melt, laugh, amaze her, or whatever reaction they want. I’ve mentioned in other posts that nonverbal communication is a whopping 93% of communication. That is to also say that verbal communication, the words you actually say, is only a pathetic 7% of what you’re communicating to her! Now hold up, this doesn’t mean you can communicate telepathically to her in complete silence. So you do have to say something. With the words, it’s more of a matter of using words that are comfortable and can flow naturally for you. Ultimately it is best to keep it simple. And with what you say, they should be relevant to the situation you are in.

How to approach a girl

Step 1: Walk up to her

The simplest, but often times overlooked step: walking up to the girl. You should avoid approaching her from behind, it will scare her. You want to do your best to be next to her or in front of her. You also want to avoid the confrontational stance, where whole body is facing her… this is too overpowering. The basic rule of thumb is, you don’t want her feet and your feet to be pointing right at each other before you even talk to her. After, you walk up to her and interrupt her, it’s okay to completely face each other. You typically want to mirror her stance, so if she’s facing a bookshelf, then you should be facing the bookshelf too. Of course you turn your head towards her to talk to her. Anyways, this leads us into the next step!

Step 2: Interrupt her

Do not be afraid to interrupt her. The moment you approach her, you are god’s gift to her. You are about to make her day and give her a moment that she will never forget. Sure, she might be busy doing something, but who isn’t in the middle of doing something? We’re always on the go, so you must get used to the fact that you will have to interrupt her. Don’t view yourself as an intruder, who is taking up her time. You took effort and time out of your day to sweep her off her feet. This is the mindset you must have. This is what you will do. After the walk up, you will tell her with certainty and clarity, “Hey, I have to tell you something…” This is the interrupt. You want her attention on you. Don’t get too caught up with the wording, remember, verbal communication only accounts for 7% of what she is receiving from you. The point is to get her to stop what she is doing and focus on you.

Step 3: Confess your love

Kidding…. or am I? But really, here is where you grow some balls and tell her the magic words, “I noticed you [doing x, y, z] and I think you’re really cute…” Tell her what you think about her! Keep it short and sweet. It’s good social intelligence to show that you know what’s going on in the environment and with what she is doing. So now you’re  thinking, “This is madness! How can it work?” I’ll tell you why, because this demonstrates a burning-never-before-seen confidence. Guys don’t do this kind of thing. The mere fact that you walked up to her and told her she’s cute, like a real man (not some pussy cat calls), demonstrates incredible value. Don’t get delusional here, it’s not magic. Not everyone will accept this, but if you practice enough where you smooth out your nervous ticks… it’ll get better as you become more confident doing this. This type of direct approach ages well like fine wine, the more you do it, the better it gets.

Step 4: Show sincerity and vulnerability

Girls don’t like being with cheesy “player” types who do this kind of stuff all the time [Ironically, you will have to do this kind of stuff all the time to get the practice needed to get good]. So, you will have to show sincerity and vulnerability. This is how you will do it…

“Hey, I have to tell you something…

” Hot Girl: What?

“I noticed you [doing x, y, z] and I think you’re really cute… I had to take a chance to meet you.”


Done deal, it’s all in the delivery. You can change the words a little to suit your style, but the principles are the same: Walk up to them, interrupt them, confess your love, and then show them sincerity. This basic format is even stronger the hotter they are.  The hotter the girl, the weaker the men are around them, so when you do an approach like this, you show uniqueness, and massive confidence. Girls love men who have balls of steel.

You may be wondering, “Mr. Asian Casanova, what about the other 93% of communication?! What do I do???” Nonverbal communication is a big topic and it will make or break the above approach, so the next post you should read would most definitely be….

Body Language Part 1: Walk The Walk of a Casanova [pending]

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